Where Else Can I Go?

It has been an interesting journey the last few years. I have found myself at the end of me and all that I have believed about what it means to be a follower of Christ. A very frustrating and confusing season of my life. Honestly I have found myself hopeless quite a few times. That is a difficult thing to say out loud as a follower of Christ. Lets face it its not a popular mainstream ”Christian” thing to be feeling.

This is one of the things that has been so confusing to me. How can I be a follower of Christ and be hopeless? On top of that I was taught at the root of my conversion that by becoming a follower of Christ that my life would be “blessed” that I would be healthy, wealthy and wise.

The truth is since becoming a follower of Christ my life has become increasingly difficult and thwart with land mines. Many of which I have stepped on and had to deal with the consequences of them. This has lead me to a place of deciding whether what I believe about God is really true.

I have ended up where the disciples ended up. Where else can we go “you have the words of life”. I have confidence in the truthfulness of the gospel. The issue is am I all in regardless of the circumstances I find myself in? Don’t get me wrong I live in the most prosperous nation in the world. I have it pretty good. However their are so many things that create confusion and doubt in this world. So many things that don’t make sense. More and more it seems to bring a confidence that I can trust a Holy God who is perfect in every way.

I am actually in a place now where I can admit I don’t understand much of why God allows some things and that is OK! It does not change the fact that He is God.

He has the words of life. Where else can I go….

Dee Dee Land

My heart is breaking. I am frustrated and angry. I recently heard some news about my big sister that really stirred some strong emotions in me. I have wrestled with all the human responses. Why God? She doesn’t deserve all the stuff she has had to deal with.

It is such a confusing scenario when a lover of God suffers. I know the answer is not all the usual well this person doesn’t go to church enough, they don’t read the bible enough, they don’t give enough etc. all the “religious” activity that we seem to think goes along with having a “blessed life”.

So that leaves me in this place of OK God what do we need to do to not suffer? The answer seems to be clearly we can’t avoid suffering as a follower of Christ. In fact the word of God clearly says we will suffer. In fact it is a blessing to suffer as it brings us to a place of complete trust and dependence on God. I can’t think of a better way to live! To be completely dependent on God and trusting him no matter what.

Over the years of observing my big sisters walk with God it has not always been perfect. It has not always been faithfully observing the “religious” duties we hold up as necessary. But one thing is for sure she has always fallen on the Rock! This is the best example a big sister can give a lost and dying world. No matter what fall upon the Rock of Jesus Christ.

So for me I am a big fan of Dee Dee Land! It sure beats Disney Land!

Lost and Found

I have recently been struck by how hard it is to navigate daily life. We all face so many details every moment of every day that frankly can affect our relationship with others in significant ways. Not to mention all the logistical situations we face. In addition the sometimes overwhelming circumstances we face in our work.

There is a part of me that just says “really are these things that big a deal?” Shortly after that I will see a headline or a situation where someone has chosen to neglect the “details” in their life and the results are deadly.

So where does that leave me? Well frankly lost! Left to myself I have proven time and time again that I will respond in anger when the situation demands understanding. I will respond in haste when the situation demand patience. I will respond my selfishness and pride when the situation demands serving and humility.

The good news is I am found. I have been hearing Bible teaching in the book of Acts for a few months now. At the beginning of the book the disciples are promised the Holy Spirit. After that there is story after story of where these knuckle heads do amazing things but the thing that is most encouraging to me is how they are different. They are clearly lead by something rather than their own selfish prideful selves.

I am finding this same power is available to me. I have found many times it is as simple as trust and obey. Many times we “hear” the right thing to do in a situation but we doubt it or we just don’t want to do it. We think really? I must be hearing incorrectly.

I am finding that this is a desperate need for me. I must be lead by the spirit and I must trust and obey. By no means am I saying by doing this that everything turns out peachy for me but it certainly beats going off on my own and trying to “figure it out”.

Is God Really For Me?

It seems this is the question beneath all the other questions. Regardless of all the circumstances of life it seems this really is the root question. Even the “little” inconveniences of life erode at this issue. It is a valid question.

Sometimes life becomes so challenging we end up wondering how could it be that a “good” God be behind all this. I have been studying some material on suffering and it has been deeply profound for me. The people I have been studying are far more intelligent than I am but as I study it I always seem to end up in the same place. Is God really for me?

Recently I was hanging with a buddy of mine who is much younger than me and very wise as well. We were discussing all the challenges we face in life. It was a lengthy discussion but as we neared the end he quietly looked at me and said we always come full circle to the question beneath all the questions. “Is God really for me?”

I was stunned! He went on to say the answer is a resounding Yes! We know God is for us without a doubt based upon the Gospel. The Gospel being God took on flesh (Jesus) and came to the earth, lived a perfect life, was brutally beaten, was nailed to a rugged cross, died a horrible death, rose on the third day, hung out with hundreds of people and then ascended to heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father.

Really think about this for a minute. God the creator of the universe did all this for us. Clearly he is for us! This changes everything. Seriously, if God is for us what else matters. Nothing else really matters. Regardless of what happens we can know without a doubt God has our back. We have complete assurance that whatever comes our way will be fully redeemed.

Redeemed in a way that will far outweighs anything we can possibly imagine. That is good news! I have been living in this truth the past couple weeks and it makes such a difference. When things come at me that confuse and hurt me I simply turn to this truth in my thoughts and sometimes in action and just ask what are you saying here God? I don’t often get clear direct answers but I have an assurance that God is telling a redemptive story with my life.

Be encouraged friends! God is for you….

Mercy and Grace

I have done some really dumb sinful things that are offensive in the sight of God and others. I have repented. I am choosing to move in the opposite direction.

What I am finding is one of the key ingredients to doing that is exactly what God offers us through his son being extended to me by the one whom I have sinned against. The humility grace and mercy they have shown me has been overwhelming. This along with the power of the Holy Spirit is beginning to bring real freedom from sin. It is a very powerful force to be offered forgiveness when you don’t deserve it!

All that being said I encourage us all to extend humble grace and mercy to those who offend us by the power of the Holy Spirit. I believe this has the power to change our world.

This is no easy task I speak of because we are all wired in a way that says I am not extending grace and mercy to this person they don’t deserve it. The really hard part is that this is true. None of us deserve forgiveness! However God commands us to forgive. That being said it seems to me that the only way we are able to do it is through the regeneration of our spirit through the same power that raised Jesus from the dead.

That is very good news! We have the same power that raised Jesus from the dead available to us in order to fulfill the command to forgive. It seems based upon what I know of the word of God. We simply need to ask for this power to obey his commands.

Be encouraged and be a doer of the word by the power of the Holy Spirit!

Archie

I made a trip back to where I grew up back in August. I had not been “home” for about 6 years and it was a pretty emotional trip for me. I had gone through some pretty ugly things when I moved away and going back stirred up a whole mess of emotions!

One of the things that was really difficult for me was to see how difficult life had become for some of the people I love so dearly. For some reason I felt like if I had just stayed there I could have made a difference in their lives and “saved” them from so much pain. I realize how silly that thinking is but that is how I felt.

The thing that really got my attention though was my Grandfather Archie. Don’t get me wrong I have no false ideas that he is somehow without major flaws but he is an absolutely amazing man. The first thing that got my attention was I stopped by my Grandmothers grave site who had died 15 years previously when I first got to town and who do I see leaving as I pull up? My Grandfather who is still head over heels in love after her being gone for 15 years! Now that is love!

Then I got to see him interact with all of his kids, grand kids and great grand kids and it was so beautiful to watch. The one that overwhelmed me was catching him tending to the chickens with my eight year old son. Nobody was around and I caught it on video. It was priceless.

I spent some time in his bedroom looking at his photographs of the stations of the cross and considered his love and faithful service to his God. It was overwhelming. I read through the history of his family name and heritage hanging on his wall and it made me feel honored to be his grandson. I spent time looking at the pictures of his life scattered all over his home and was struck by all the lives he had touched and that had touched him.

Visiting him filled me with hope that simply a life well lived is honorable and the simple legacy of a man who served his country his family and his God is what its all about. My only wish is that I can be half the man he is!

How Deep The Father’s Love For Us

Something I have realized over the past few years is no matter what comes my way in life I know without a doubt that God loves me. Many things have come my way that has brought doubt and fear as well as unbelief at times but I always knew that my Father loves me. This has been such a comfort s well as a strength.

I now realize this confidence in God’s love toward me stems from growing up with a father that loved me well! Yes he allowed many things to enter my life that were difficult to process and created doubt, fear and unbelief but again I always knew I was loved by him deeply. This has created such a confidence in me that has allowed me to become the man that God intended me to be.

So on this Father’s day I want to recognize Pops my Father who has loved me well! Thanks Pops…

My Mother Loyalty and Christ

Loyalty at its Best

I was stunned the other day when I realized that there were a few people in my life that have been completely loyal to me throughout my life. Two of them Mother’s and the other one is the Son of God. I know loyalty is not cool or in style these days but if you think about it for a few minutes it is one of the most valuable character traits there is and one of the most difficult to actually practice.

The beautiful thing on behalf of my Mother is it comes so naturally for her. Don’t get me wrong I am sure it has been very difficult for her to practice being loyal in many cases throughout the years but it is just who she is. She has never given up on me on life or on her husband and kids. She chooses to honor her man when at many times over the years she has been questioned by others. She chooses to honor her family and her God in spite of it not being popular.

I am so grateful for her example for the past 44 years. I would not be the person I am today if she had not demonstrated Christ like loyalty to me. Her teaching me this loyalty has been such a blessing in my life. You don’t marry at 22 years old and stay loyally married to the same woman for 22 years without some intense loyalty.

You don’t here the loyalty of Christ being talked about very often but it is so intense and frankly we would be lost without it. He said he will “never leave us or forsake us” and what a promise that is. Knowing that about God as well as my Mother and now my wife is an intense blessing. It allows me to be the man God created me to be.

So happy mothers Day Mom….

I love you dearly….

The Bride

My grandfather always called my grandmother his bride. It stuck with me to this day. I am not exactly sure why other than it is a great reminder that she is way more than my wife. I fell deeply in love with her in the beginning and it is a great reminder to me of that fact. My bride has taught me more than anyone about the unconditional love, acceptance and loyalty of Christ than anyone. However life can really distort our picture of the ones we love the most. This seems to be the case in marriage as well as being the “bride of Christ”. We all know the reasons so I will bypass that discussion.

My point here is “the church” is referred to as “the bride of Christ”. This has been a serious wake up call to me. I have had some difficulties with “the church” over the past year or so. To the point of ignoring it all together. Don’t get me wrong I love God with all my heart mind soul and strength it has just been a very difficult season for me with “the church”.

Yesterday one of my dear friends pointed out that some of the things said about “the church” were ugly and that if someone said these things about his bride he would be deeply offended. This translates directly into “the church” being Christ’s bride.

This truth has stopped me in my tracks! After reflecting on this for a bit I have repented for my attitudes toward the church. Once I had a chance to consider things I actually do love the church. Even with its spots, blemishes and wrinkles.

I want to find a home. I want to be in the “bride of Christ”. I desire to be used to serve. Remember the symbolism here. There is no deeper love that the groom bride relationship. This is intimacy at its deepest level. This is the desire of every heart to drink deeply of this kind of love.

New Math

It has been a very rough season in my life the past 2 years. Many twists and turns, defeats, victories and some challenges to my theology. I always thought believing in God+Living a “moral” life= Blessings. I have discovered this is a crock! I mean it’s kind of silly to think that when the Bible is full of stories of people who suffered greatly by following Christ. Why would I think it would be different for me.